Happy Mothers Day!

Happy Mother's Day every one! I am priveledged to know many great, amazing, kind women who do the title and meaning of "Mother" much justice. I'm grateful for their examples and wish them a very happy day!

And as for my own mom...well, what can I say? She is perfect. As far as support, love, advice, humor, wisdom and friendship, my mom has been everything I've needed to navigate this life (and many times still is).

Lately, I've been pondering a lot of things regarding our personal choices and the things that influence them as well as where those choices will take us. So in tribute to my sweet mother, I thought I'd put on record a few of the things I've learned from her that have left a huge impact on me and who I hope to become.

1.

Kindness is the essence of greatness and the fundamental characteristic of the noblest men and women I have known. Kindness is a passport that opens doors and fashions friends. It softens hearts and molds relationships that can last lifetimes."

"Kindness is the essence of a celestial life. Kindness is how a Christlike person treats others."

--Joseph B. Wirthlin, "The Virtue of Kindness"

I know I've mentioned this before, but if I could sum up one of the greatest lessons my mom has ever taught me, it's to "be kind and nice".  To this day, when I'm not sure what to do regarding a sticky social situation, the words, "be kind and nice" echo in my mind. Not only is my mom a generally very nice person to those she comes into daily contact with (don't even get me started on her ability to charm difficult people), but I saw her put these words into practice in some of the most difficult, unjust, and hurtful situations, where choosing to act something other than kind and nice, would have perhaps been the easier, more deserved way to behave.

It was this example that made everytime I went to her with a frustrating situation (admittedly, after some good venting) I would ask her what to do, she would respond, "Be kind and nice, that's all you can do". And I would know from her example that was not only the best option, but the only option.


2.

"...be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”

--1 Timothy 4:12

You know those people who you never have to question their values or what they think, but at the same time you're drawn to them and desire to be around them? My mom is one of those people. My mom has never been the type of person to "cordially" laugh at a dirty joke or pretend not to notice offensive acts out of fear of offending or not fitting in. Yet, it has been my observation that it is such stances that only seem to draw people in. It's a combination of goodness and love (I don't think one works without the other) and that's who she is, and well, who doesn't want to be around that?

I feel she has also been a huge example of this to me in regards to motherhood. She was always my mother first before she was my friend. She never shyed away from telling me exactly what I needed to hear out of fear of losing our relationship or offending me. Which is ironic, because it is how her first priority to be my mother made it my first priority to be her friend.

I pray to be this type of example and mother. I don't know if I'm there yet but I hope beyond all hope I'll have the same relationship with my children that I have with her.

3.

"Some people look for a beautiful place--others make a place beautiful"

--Hazrat Inayat Khan

 Oh, I love my parents' home! The little haven I had the pivilege to grow up in! My mom has an innate creative ability to decorate and make her surroundings beautiful. Growing up she stitched hundreds of thoughtful, uplifting and inspiring messages and images that were placed throughout our home while turning our yard in the summer time into a colorful oasis. Do I think these qualities are required to be a good mom? No. But oh, how I love this about my mother! Not only was it so very fun watching her and helping her do these things growing up, but making my home a beautiful place where my family and I want to be is one of the biggest things that brings me joy and satisfaction as a wife and mother. 

Mom, I could go on and on about how wonderful I think you are. I consider you to be one of the greatest blessings I have in this life. Happy Mothers Day! I love you!

Trying

 Ryder and Penny trying to learn to ride their scooters :)

One of the hardest things I find about being a mom is never really feeling like a live up to the mom I hope or want to be. In my head I create a list of things I hope to get accomplished that day. Everything from chores and working out to one-on-one time and family prayer. And here's the truth: I honestly don't think I've ever had a day in my life as a mother where I've checked everything off that list. If we went and played at the park, that probably means the laundry is still sitting in the dryer. If I got my house clean and appointments made, then my kids have most likely been couped up in the house all day watching too much TV.

My brain is constantly trying to work through ways to make the cleaning more efficient, to find interesting ways to do the things I find boring all the while trying to teach my kids the things they need to know to be the people I hope they become one day. It's exhausting. And the sad thing is if you were to look at my house or my daily actions, you'd have no idea that I was trying so hard! {said with a whine}. 

I know I'm pregnant, which tends to slow me down quite a bit these days, plus today is one of those more frustrating days (I can't be sure, but there's a small possibility crazy hormones may or may not be involved) but that doesn't take away my want to be the mom I hope to be, which is perhaps why I'm finding this whole thing a bit more frustrating than usual. 

Luckily, I'm a huge believer in "I'll try again tomorrow". I don't ever get too bothered in getting caught up in the guilt of it all because tomorrow is a new day. A clean slate. A fresh start. Etch-a-Sketch. I'm pretty sure it's my belief in this philosophy of mine that keeps me sane. And even though I don't really see much progress day to day or even week to week, I do think I've seen enough improvement in the last four and a half years that makes me feel like I'm at least headed in the right direction. And that's all that matters, right? That we're trying. 

Which sometimes makes me think how very important "just trying" is. I am so grateful for a Heavenly Father who can see our desires. Even though he sees my messy house and my bad moods, He can also see what I reeally, truly want. I strongly believe even when our actions can't always measure up to the desires of our hearts, those desires certainly count for something. Actually, I think they count for a lot. And well, on a day like today...or rather, throughout the next few months, I find that rather comforting. 

For I, the Lord, will judge all men according to their works, according to the desire of their hearts.

Doctrine & Covenants 137:9